Encouragement

When someone showers me with meaningful words, it is a gift beyond the greatest material gift in the world, because I can tuck these words in a pocket in my mind and pull them out anytime I need direction, reinforcement or strength. Sometimes they come in the form of a song lyric or poem, and sometimes they arrive as a single dynamic sentiment that will live inside me, and fortify me forever. It’s amazing—the difference a few words can make.

I’ll be forever grateful to Sally Reed who reached out to me when Hugh was nearing the end of his rope after many months of rehabilitation. Here’s an excerpt from Learning by Accident:

When I email the Lance Armstrong Foundation, an organization devoted to cancer victims and their families, I reach a woman named Sally, a cancer survivor herself. We never meet, and yet we email back and forth and she reaches out to me in a profound way. I ask her in desperation, “How can I help my husband? I feel so useless. What can I do to make a difference?”

She writes back: “Remind him that you love him. Remind him of his past. Remind him that you love him. Remind him of your history with each other. Remind him of his daughters’ birthdays, your birthday, anniversary, and remind him that you love him. Talk to him, talk to him, talk to him, and remind him.”

This is some of the simplest but most useful advice I have ever received. Thank you, Sally.