Newsflash!

The cover of Learning by Accident is done!

Many thanks to Nancy Tomlinson for taking the picture of me and Hugh at S-Turns in the Outer Banks, and many thanks for the hours of work my sister, Pat, dedicated to create a print-ready cover. This has truly been a homegrown project and I couldn't be more delighted.

The book will move into the production phase now, so in four to six weeks it should be available for purchase from me, in stores, or online at Amazon and Barnes & Noble.com. Learning by Accident will also be available in ebook and Kindle forms.

Stay tuned! We'll be planning a book launch soon, and thank you for hanging in there for the long wait!

--

What does Caring and Giving Mean?

To me, the words "caring and giving" are not only the building blocks of the word and act of caregiving, but they represent the meaning of our lives.

We spend our highest and lowest moments with those we care most deeply about, and when we give back to them, we grow. In its simplest form, caring is transformational. A reassuring smile from a loved one when you're afraid, or a hand squeeze when you feel pain, can make you feel like you can endure anything.

Caring and giving equal kindness.  And in the slideshow we review again and again in our minds, all throughout our lives, it is kindness that reassures and calms us, because it represents the very core of our best selves.

Questions We Ask Ourselves

Often, we look at things only one way. I’m guilty of this. 

When a caregiving situation becomes a challenge, I might ask myself, "Why can't things ever go right for a change?" When I fall into this self-pity pit, I shift my thinking; there are other questions I ask myself to ease my frustration.

If you are stuck in sadness or bitterness, try asking yourself these questions:

"How else could I respond to this experience? What small action can I take right now to make things a little bit better?  How have others handled my problem? What can I learn from them? What would I say to someone in my situation if I wanted to help him or her?"

The answer to this last question sometimes solves the dilemma all by itself.

Making negative sweeping statements to ourselves is damaging on so many levels. Statements like: "I'll never be able to do this," or "This will never end," entrench us in a mucky pond of misery. Once we accept that we are being swiftly carried in the current of a dynamic life, we know we'll glide over the jagged rocks and once again bask in a pool of calm, silvery water, so we'll hang in there for the ride, no matter how unsettling the journey, because the good times make the bad times worth it.